F.A.Q.
Are you guys brothers and/or gay lovers?
Homosexual incest? Life’s too short to be that open-minded.
What is the ultimate goal of your site?
Zor: “Knowing we’ve entertained many people, creative satisfaction, popularity”. Tommy: “Money.”
What do you guys do for a living?
Your mom, and mind your own business.
What was your educational background?
Tommy’s is network engineering, and Zor…well, he’s changed school programs so many times that soon he’ll be the guy who fixes your car while he bakes a cake in a restaraunt managed by him while he does your taxes.
Where are you guys from?
Ontario, Canada. If we gave you any more detail, it just wouldn’t be fair. We can only date so many girls at once.
What inspires you two to write your material?
Zor: “Literature, experience, random thoughts”. Tommy: “Vodka and Gatorade.”
How can I get involved with the website or contribute material?
Go away.
What advice do you have for aspiring writers?
Zor: “If it gets too hard, quit.” Tommy: “Yup.”
Which of the two of you are older?
Tommy is, by 9 months. Different mother, just so we’re clear.
Betty or Veronica?
Zor: “Veronica”. Tommy: “Betty and Veronica at the same time, while Moose watches and Big Ethel videotapes the whole thing.”
Pepsi or Coke?
Zor: “Pepsi. Coke makes your teeth grit if you move them side to side and is too lemony”. Tommy: “Pepsi. We wouldn’t be friends if we liked something different. If I can be more precise, Crystal Pepsi.”
Favourite bar drinks?
Zor: Vodka Redbull. “It’s bad for you but it gives me drunken energy to do horrible things”. Tommy: “Gin & Tonic, or if no one’s judging me…creme de menthe and club soda.” Disgusting.
Who’s better at golf?
Zor is, but Tommy has a kickass drive 20% of the time, or less.
What kind of computers do you guys use to run/design the site?
Dell & HP, because we love the foreign tech support. A lot.
Who’s banged more women?
Zor: Ask me in a year. Tommy: (no response. busy banging at the moment)
We’re hot girls, how can we propose to you guys?
Don’t bother unless you have money. If you do have money, you’ll figure it out.
Do you like fat, lazy, uneducated American women?
OK, that totally isn’t a frequently asked question.
How do we hire Zor to do magic at a party or event?
If Zor’s at your party or event, the magic is already happening behind a hallway somewhere with the girl who has the biggest rack.
Who was more popular in high school?
We were both very popular in our own way, but Zor was probably more popular. That tends to happen when the other spends a good chuck on time in detention or trying to surf the Internet on 386s running Citrix.
Who’s better at Street Fighter Alpha 2, especially at the superior Sega Saturn home conversion, complete with arcade controllers?
Tommy, no question. [Zor edit: Hey, fuck you.]
