the Tommy|Zor era

I don’t know what the hell v2 has in mind for 5-1, but I cannot think of anything greater than these five.

10 – Proving someone wrong

There are two times in your life when your ego will grow to extraordinary proportions.
a) You get into that nice heated debate with someone over a major topic… hypothetically, let’s just say you get into an argument with your best friend about why the internet will not cater to him and his website. We’ll call him tommy… nevermind. That’s a bit too obvious, I should delete it.
Hypothetical situation: You get into an argument with someone that escalates into the threshold of violence. In the end, you were right all along. Knowing that person has to live the rest of his or her life with a crushed ego whenever he or she is around you = awesome.

b) Someone in your life (most likely your grade school teacher) assumes you will be a failure and expects you to amount to nothing. You return years later as an accomplished and world famous actor, musician, magician, engineer, med-patent sales rep, etc. just to brag. Alternatively, you hear it’s impossible to click your mouse 300 times in 30 seconds. Not only do you destroy that impossibility, you provide proof.

These two will come back as rulers of the UNIVERSE

9 – First time you kiss someone attractive

Yeah, you’ve kissed your grandmother, that random person at a party (but you’re not sure who because you were too hammered and hope to all high-hell they won’t remember you) and your boss/teacher/foreman/border patrol’s ass. All that is put to shame when you finally kiss your first 9.3. Don’t lie and say that person was a 10 – very few people in the world are solid 10s, let alone those who stand a chance with them.
The first time that happens, your self-esteem and social worth shoot through the fucking roof. Some idolize you while others love you out of jealousy. You go around bragging to everyone, then act nonchalant about the whole matter while secretly high-fiving your best friend over and over.

8 – Succeeding at a long-term goal

When you were five, you wrote down a list of things you wanted to do in life. At the age of fifteen, you find this list and laugh at how stupid you were as a child… then re-write the list in your current hand-writing.
Today, you’re crossing things off the list.
Visit Spain.
Buy a car.
Get my first paid gig.
Call a girl the wrong name in bed and get away with it. <—- hypothetical of course.

It now excites you to keep adding to that list.

I have very modest life goals

7 – Finding money in the street

Pennies, nickels, dimes and quarters are commonplace on the street and nothing special to find. Bills, however are priceless.
ZOR TIP: To increase your chances of finding $20 bills, visit your local bar on a crowded night. Bonus points if you knock it out of someone’s hands, pick it up and yell “MAGIC!”and walk away. If  an argument ensues, simply state there is no evidence to prove the bill belonged to the person in the first place. I don’t condone such behaviour, but it would be entertaining.

6 – Being an epic hero

Best feeling ever: someone simply tells you, “You are my hero.”
Specifically, after you’ve hit a 3-run homer to give your baseball team a back-to-back World Series win in 1993.
Yes, Canada is still talking about it.

To v2: I hope I stole some of your ideas and caused you unnecessary stress. That’s what you get for giving yourself the pimp spot.

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